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October 19, 2009
...“I Blush or Stutter Around My Crush”
Question From Hannah: hello! my name is hannah and i thought that this book was excellent! Lanie always seems so herself and relaxed around Clayton whenever they talk and i want to achieve this too with my crush. I always blush or stutter and go anti social whenever im around him, but he likes socialable girls that make him laugh. im funny and talkative with my friends and others but not with him. Please help me to be more like Lanie? thank you so very much.
Response: When something makes us nervous; be it speaking in public, walking into a new social setting, or being near someone we like, we loose about 50 IQ points. The blood rushes from our heads and we blather or stare into space because we believe there is so much at stake. We fear we have everything to lose. The cure is remembering that you actually have nothing to lose. You were you when you walked into the nervous setting and you will be you when you leave. Nobody gets to take that from you. Not a boy. Not a social group. Nobody. If you are unable to behave like yourself around this boy today, maybe you will be more able to do it tomorrow. The key is to keep trying. Your goal is to be around him enough to lose the bulk of your nerves. It’s easier to do this with other people around. You’ll build up your tolerance to being in his presence and eventually you will find that you are able to be as cute and charming with him as you are with your friends. Try to relax and consider that just like you, this boy is very busy growing up. It’s tough work.
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